Friday, April 18, 2014


"A photograph of what I'm grateful for/my child;
once a week, every week." 

My weekdays retreat.

I've been a bit off-course for quite sometimes after our 3 years indoctrination program to meet ICAO qualification as aircraft inspector, now that I was assigned in certification sub-unit
under engineering. It's a whole different game that I have to unlearn everything and literally change the brain. I began
to doubt myself and became numb. But don't get me wrong,
I enjoy this part of specialisation. I still enjoy playing inspector,
but doing certification blew my mind and I can't help it -
I love it every single time.

But I feel dumb for each new cases I encounter and learn and read
and learn and read and learn. And I got off-course as I read, 'cause my favourite reading material are articles/blogs/short stories.
Not certification standards.

So I decided that I calculate my daily salary and work to the value of what I'm getting paid for, or perform more so that the barakah will materialize in other forms. It's a way to keep myself on track.

And last week, I was 'playing' inspector and was offered
a job and double the current salary.
I just laughed it off. And shrugged it off.
They must be kidding.

I know what I'm currently getting is much less as compared to what the industry is paying; but considering all the things I'm getting : cool colleagues, harmonious working environment, diverse scope of  knowledge and experiences, paid duty travels, conveniences (it only takes me 10 minutes drive to the office.
I keluar rumah 8.10 AM and punch in before 8.30 AM!) etc etc,
no extra money in the world would be able to buy that!

Then it struck me.
Allah is showing me that I'm getting more out of this! More than just daily salary - that if I were to be paid double the money,
it will still not equate to the total value of things I'm getting.

Ya Rahman Ya Rahim.
Help me diligently serve the country.

Monday, April 7, 2014


"A photograph of what I'm grateful for/my child;
once a week, every week." 

When that someone hug you so tight,
all your broken pieces will stick back together.

So he left yet again...
Yes, I'm saying he's back then he's gone.

I'd say when he returned last fortnight, I wanted him all for myself. It's like he's gotta make up for all the lost time we've been away. Two and a half month with 4 days break in between,
I don't think I can tolerate longer than that.
So please say never to offshore jobs, syg PLEASE.

But who am I kidding. He's been away from everybody
and he's gotta make up for everything! In a mere 10 days.

I wanted to fill it up with good ol' 'quality time'
but there were too many things and too little time.
Tried squeezing in things each and everyday left us (ehem me)
with huge brimming bubble of frustation... that popped couple of times with downpour of tears for absolutely ridiculous reasons. Ngeee.

But he fixed it with ice cream treat, all ears to a long deep conversation by the roadside.
He just knows his wife too well and I'm all cured.

He's just away and he's not around.
That - does not make him absent.

Thursday, April 3, 2014


"A photograph of what I'm grateful for/my child;
once a week, every week." 

Unwell. Keeping her proximity to the toilet bowl
for a quick round of throw ups.

Thursday, March 27, 2014


That Monday, I walked into the office not expecting it'd sound 
that quiet... and deserted, when everybody were around 
(this normally happens when most of the officers are
on duty travel, but it wasn't). It was a grave silence. 

We were literally mourning only after 48 hours. 
It's not like we stopped having hopes.
But our technical capacity tells us anything beyond it is miracle.

I walked to the pantry, a place where we can talk technical issues informally and throw stupid questions without being judged. 
It's like our kedai kopi. An info-cultured kedai kopi
cum informal meeting room where everybody talk,
everybody listen, everybody learn. 

There were the frequent participants but it was strangely quiet, conversations were made in low tone voices. It's almost like everybody was whispering. Overheard our Deputy Director who is a 'maintenance' subject matter expert (SME) threw questions to our avionics SME on equipment installation, accessibility and control etc. Here, we know we are not the expert of everything. And we acknowledge the fact that somebody else may know
more than we do. We seek information and facts.
But not truth. Truth is not within our workscope.

It never fails to amaze me when non-experts dare to open their mouth and blabber. My benchmark are all these experienced aviation experts around me who would rather keep quiet
for they know that they do not know the extent of the situation for them to speak up. So those of you who keep talking, what do you want? To get to the truth? Like seriously? Just by talking and posting on FB and spreading things on Whatsapp? Who are you? Next-of-kin? Will truth do you good, change the your life?

It has changed our life.
It has changed Malaysia.
It has changed the history.

Not only we should accept that it has happened,
The All-Knowing let it happened.
Given the current situation, it is so hard to get to
 the information and facts. And therefore, the truth.
The All-Knowing will lead us there.

We have to practice more to be practicing.

It has became more quiet and deserted since then
now they're (SMEs) on site supporting the Director General.

For more info:

Friday, March 14, 2014


"A photograph of what I'm grateful for/my child;
once a week, every week." 


We were both busy on our 1st.
He was in Thailand on our 2nd.
I was in the States on our 3rd.
And he is in Vietnam on our 4th.

AMAZINGGGG. No real celebration so far.

I know, I'm obviously counting the wrong thing... :P

So here goes; cliche.